I ain't raising no raisin

Raisins... Why raisins? Leave the poor ol grape alone. Grapes are sexay. But when they "morph" into shrivelled up miniature prunes, which are HAZARDOUS to humans, mind you...
They taste disgustingly sourish and... poopy. Heck, they even look like deer poop. Or rat poo. Poo in general ok?
Since it's birth in Israel in 500 BC, raisins have since plagued the entire world.
They've conquered "Cerea-Land" and you can spot them hiding not-so-innocently between the cornflakes.
Even Anus the Great, (now known as Famous Amos) was not spared. His deliciously yummy, crunchy... NOW RAISIN infested cookies have caused his empire to perish.
Compare grapes to raisins... Grapes are such perteh fruits. They come in green, purple, red... then there's raisins! The Outcast if the Grape Vine. Turds of the vine.

Another reason to hate raisins, is it's utmost resemblance to a dead/alive... bug.
Take a look...






A bunch of ticks having an orgy









A raisin





UH HUH! Fooled ya didnt I!? I knew it!

Other valid reasons to despise raisins:

1.) raisins are just rabbit-breeders making that last bit of coin on the consumers' gullibility.
2.) raisins can be used as bullets thus, promotes violence
3.) you may trip over a raisin and break your back bone
4.) Raisins contain nicotine
5.) Raisins are boy band's official snack
6.) Raisins kill your dog. (dog owners, take note. TRUE!!!)
7.) Your annoying nephew can choke on a raisin and die. Hey!.. hmm....

Okay here's the song part.

Oh raisins, they look like poo.
People hate them, i do too.
Let's burn them all, spare the grapes,
Uhm... raisins cause date rapes?

True Story: One time, like this raisin thingy, like fell from a plane. And then it like, it hit a little Kazakhstani boy, and he like... cried! Dude!

Conclusion: Raisins KILL! They only "rais" problems and "rais" deaths... So lets "e-rais" Raisins from the surface of God's Green Earth!

JOIN ME IN THIS COMBAT! RAISINS MAY COVER THE SUN, FILLING THE SKY, BUT WE WILL DESTROY THEM IN THE SHADE THEN! FOR SPARTAAAAA!!!!!! .. okay sorry... too much 300 influence.
Leonidas pawns! (and doesn't eat raisins)

p.s: Join the "Rawr! Rape Raisins!" Club this very instant! Yes, NOW you moron. Before it's too late. Call 1-800-raisins-r-retards or visit www.raisins?riiiiight.com