FHM Fan Mail ~ Humpathon

As some of you may already not know, I'm currently working with FHM Malaysia. If you're another one of those going "BRO! YOU GOT THE BEST JOB EVER LAH! YOU SEE CHICKS EVERY DAY. TITS! ASS! HOW DOES IT FEEL? (how do THEY feel?) YOU'RE SO LUCKY!" - let me stop you right there. I spend possibly, one or two days a month attending photoshoots, the rest of my working life for FHM is spent in front of the PC writing stories, reading e-mails, attending meetings after meetings, brainstorming ideas, editing and being sarcastic. It IS a great job, yes, but only because I've always liked writing and I've been reading FHM for a decade now. Back to today's post, my job scope includes overlooking all aspects of the magazine, and yes, this includes our social media platforms. Going through all the comments, filtering the offensive ones and reading whatever our dear readers or random netizens send to our e-mail inbox or Facebook inbox is a pretty damn good stress reliever, I tells ya! Sure as Hell beats reading 50 Shades of Grey (just guessing here). What makes it even funnier is that a majority of these guys can't seem to fathom that they're sending messages to FHM's page. A page that changes its profile picture monthly, a page that posts up all sorts of content, a page... not an actual girl.
Keeping these hilarious messages all to myself would be selfish, and I'm all up for sharing anything (besides bacon, alcohol, Kate Upton, my books and past issues of FHM) so I've taken the liberty to compile some of the messages sent to FHM since 2014 for you lot.